HEADCANON 002://     after discussions with @nothitlersclone ( you should seriously follow - amazing person right here ) and just Pam is pushed away from her family, we know her family’s view on interracial couples isn’t exactly great ( they wouldn’t let edie have her interracial baby in the house ) , we also know pam ( unintentionally - she felt bad once told they were skinheads ) had drinks with some skinheads  the main point is she grows up IN A VERY CONSERVATIVE AREA - WITH VERY CONSERVATIVE VIEWS. so, when their daughter starts to be very openly bisexual ( since we know pam isn’t one for labels either ) they would start to push her away from the farm - we also know she had to pay for her own college tuition - which makes me head canon she basically gets told to leave at eighteen. However, Pam loves her family and loves their farm - and so – always tries to get back in ( remember the present she hand made for her dad - and spent the whole weekend making it ) 

Pam never wanted to be in NYC - she would have rather stayed on her family’s farm and taken over the family business but Pam was not welcome with her family anymore - also pam’s family / friends - all hate her for moving to NYC. Edie tells Pam that everyone hates her for moving. it’s also why pam just plays this really over-confident act - which we know is an act - how many times has pam cried from an insulting comment - but other times the same level of insult hasn’t caused her to cry?? her story is shakey and pam really likes pam - which is great - but pam knows not everyone likes her - and will do anything ( including getting addicted to cocaine ) to be liked - showing again - that perhaps pam was kicked out from her family - or at least shoved away. 

what this long thing is meant to suggest is - pam poovey has one hell of an upbringing - she loved her childhood - but from the age of 16 onwards it went down hill and you can tell - by college Pam knew she had to move on with her life - and it was probably the time when she invented ‘super confident pam poovey.’ and left ‘country pam poovey’ behind.